Texts From Last Night

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  (425): View more from Washington

  he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.

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  (425): he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick. http://tfl.nu/08s1
  Replies (28) Good night (4799) Bad night (759)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday

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  (203): franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday http://tfl.nu/o3qe
  Replies (35) Good night (3367) Bad night (688)
• Favorite

  (931): View more from Tennessee

  just woke up in my neighbors garage.

  (931): View more from Tennessee

  scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.

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  (931): just woke up in my neighbors garage. (931): scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage. http://tfl.nu/x40j
  Replies (21) Good night (9348) Bad night (1265)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous

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  (973): she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous http://tfl.nu/o10z
  Replies (9) Good night (1312) Bad night (5086)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  There is too much vodka and too much dick.

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  (860): There is too much vodka and too much dick. http://tfl.nu/9jud
  Replies (25) Good night (3565) Bad night (1663)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.

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  (773): I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe. http://tfl.nu/xtio
  Replies (6) Good night (3070) Bad night (938)
• Favorite

  (905): View more from Ontario

  Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.

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  (905): Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights. http://tfl.nu/cnu2
  Replies (4) Good night (2333) Bad night (786)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?

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  (816): We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right? http://tfl.nu/k62y
  Replies (3) Good night (1736) Bad night (533)
• Favorite

  (810): View more from Michigan

  She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.

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  (810): She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room. http://tfl.nu/nven
  Replies (3) Good night (884) Bad night (1317)
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.

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  (302): You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English. http://tfl.nu/fod6
  Replies (5) Good night (621) Bad night (1576)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today

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  (614): Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today http://tfl.nu/chyo
  Replies (5) Good night (957) Bad night (391)
• Favorite

  (856): View more from New Jersey

  I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?

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  (856): I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life? http://tfl.nu/hhin
  Replies (4) Good night (299) Bad night (582)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.

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  (505): It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row. http://tfl.nu/22so
  Replies (6) Good night (251) Bad night (504)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed

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  (425): I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed http://tfl.nu/xp1l
  Replies (1) Good night (513) Bad night (195)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.

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  (704): Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day. http://tfl.nu/lzy7
  Replies (7) Good night (281) Bad night (242)

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