know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
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