ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
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