there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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