Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
