Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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