That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
These People Had Regrettable One Night Stands
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
This Girl Makes Latte Art That’s Too Cute to Drink
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.