Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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