The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
