the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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