You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
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