I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
