just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
