this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
