I must be too annoying 4 u.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
