No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I've blown a few things in my day
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
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