i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
