His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
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