I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
