3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Just high enough for therapy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize