question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Randomize
