we have officially lost it.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Every concussion has its silver lining
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
