Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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