You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Randomize