There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
What did we do last night that was yellow?
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Randomize
