What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Randomize
