I have demons in me.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
