Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
