So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
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