Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
