it's too hot outside to masturbate.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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