Well apparently he's into motor boating.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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