just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
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