Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
You made out with two different species that night
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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