Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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