Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize