did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
Randomize