Define "chronic" masturbator.
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
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