so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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