I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
