butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Randomize
