When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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