shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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