Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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