in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Randomize