Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Randomize
