Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
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