I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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