I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
True college students do jello shots in the library
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