I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
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